Selfish

I've been doing some soul-searching lately and I keep wondering if I am selfish.

It started a few weeks ago when I talked to an old boyfriend and I realized I was just a horrible, horrible person. This man used to drive nearly three hours every weekend to come and see me and do you know what I did? I went out with my friends! Horrible, right? I can't believe I actually did that! Granted, I was 21 - just out of college, had no idea what I was going to do with my life, but still....

I don't remember being that awful, but I asked my mom and she said that I was! Maybe, I blocked it out because I don't want to be associated with the type of person I was before. Why did he stay? I would've been like "See ya!" and out the door if someone treated me like that. I guess that's easier said than done.

I really just never considered myself a selfish person, but I guess I am. I always think of other people before I think of myself. I always make decisions in an effort to spare someone hurt feelings. But, I guess when you're self-involved, you can't really see it. You don't know you're that way and when people tell you that you are, you don't believe them.

So, I'm adding that to my list of goals - stop being selfish. God help me!